The Figure in the Mirror

I have always been told yesterday is a memory, and too look only unto tomorrow, Yet what if the yesterday comes and pay’s a visit with no warning, what happen’s then? What are we supposed too do? I mean, yesterday I drove a path I walked physically a year ago,
I assumed I would be fine, how could something so small impact now?
So, I drove the road, no thought’s other then safety, until a vision flashed before my eyes, at which point, my stomach turned and the tears threatened to flow. Could I drive safely? I had no choice, my being didn’t matter, those in the car beside me did.

Driving, turn the wheel,
Check the mirror’s,
check the road ahead, be aware,
Follow the speed limit, be aware of cars behind and in front,
Check the mirrors, be aware,
Suddenly a figure in the rear view mirror,
A reflection of a time gone,
Gripping the wheel tighter, I pray its a blink and gone moment,
I focus on the road ahead, glance into the side mirror,
The figure follows, No face, No definition, just a memory,
I focus harder, wish this figure to go, tell myself it’s nothing,
I drive the road, I last travelled in a time of distress and fear,
Safety, I need to focus on now and safety, despite my stomach turning,
My knuckles white, as tears threaten to flow, I breathe deeper,
No where to pull over, I have to keep driving,

The figure in every mirror, walking a path of uncertainty,
Darkness, lights flashing through, lorries approaching fast,
Stopping to pick up a broken bottle, the glass glistening in the half light,
Yet this is a nothing more then a memory, a time once gone,
Why is it there now, why bother me now, what have I done?

The tears threatening to flow, my breathing shallow,
I drive with the figure in the mirror, I feel her fear, I feel her pain,
I blink and pray she goes, I tell myself it’s nothing but a memory,

As tears burn my cheeks, I feel a hand on my thigh,
I hear a reassuring voice, I can’t pull over, there is no where,
I need to keep driving, I have to focus on those around me,
As that figure in the mirrors follows me,

I fight back the sickness, I fight the emotions washing over me,
I will deal with those later, I need to be safe, for those beside me,
As the figure stands in my mirror, I see her collapse in exhaustion,
I sense my body becoming tired, but I must drive on,
I cannot rescue her, she is the past, I need to move forward.

Finally the road ends, as the figure fades back into my soul,
Finally I can drive without fear, my knuckles loosen, my breathing calms,
The hand on my thigh still reassuring, I am thankful for automatic’s,
I know my payment for the pain will come, but until then,
The figure is back in her darkness, back in her comfort,
Waiting, holding on to hope, waiting, just praying….

I am not afraid