Laying in bed, late last night,
My eyes slowly closing, I wait for peace,
I wait for sleep, I wait for quiet,
Moment’s later, my eye’s open,
Hoping hours had passed,
Yet nothing but a few had,
I find myself in solitude,
I see a wall, yet beyond nothing makes sense,
I see before me a place I do not know,
I find myself in emptiness,
I see a wall, but I do not know what stands before me,
I see curtains, a window, but beyond means nothing,
My head spins, my confusion begins,
I do not know where I am, yet it should be so clear,
I don’t understand reality from dreams,
I don’t know where I am,
I hold my breath, I hold my soul,
I pray to wake from a unknown,
I pray to seek a moment of comfort,
Yet nothing comes, I cry out for security, yet I am lost,
The awake doesn’t come,
I feel that, this is real,
Lost in a world of unknown,
I feel reality, yet I feel a dream,
I feel pain, I feel fear,
So real, so frightening, so unknown,
I don’t know if I am awake,
I don’t know if I am sleeping,
I just feel fear, I fear unknown,
I pray for escape, yet it doesn’t come,
I wonder what is to become, yet the pain holds close,
I shiver, I shake, I hold a unknown,
No control, I have no choice,
Yet to hold the moment, allow it to take control,
My life, yet not my control,
Life, one not of my doing

Others, fear, despair, and more,
Holding my path to the next,
What do I have to do,
To surrender this nightmare, to ensure,
That the path to the next is one of ease,
and one of calm, with no fear, no pain?

That is all I pray,
Is it truly too much?

Am I expecting too much,
Is asking for myself too much,
Is needing really that selfish,
I am sorry, I will not allow this longer,
I am sorry, this will not continue,
I am sorry, sorry for my reality,
I am sorry,
This will end.