I got to see my bubba’s last week, it was too long, and it’s too long until the next time, I know every second is noted and written, every negative documented, every move we do, but I don’t care,
I got to hold them, hear their voices, hear their laughter, see their smiles,
We got to talk to them, listen to them. Little thing’s that were once taken for granted, little thing’s that normal every day families assume will always be there. We were once that family, then mental health meant we were not allowed, yet I no longer have mental health?
Its a confusing mess, but we got to see our bubba’s and that is the most important thing.
We gave them gifts, not gifts of toy’s, for what are toy’s in a time of uncertainty and non normal life? Instead, a photo book, and a framed family tree I created in Photoshop. Memories and a history they can take with them, grow on and make their own as their paths move forward, whilst keeping their roots firmly with each other, and with us.
I don’t wish to say much, I wish to hold this moment in my soul until the brief next time, (including that dinosaur)!
To be able to come here with something positive for once, a change from the rest, these little faces I adore,
I will forever regret the place they have found themselves in due to my own selfish being, but I hope they know, no matter what, whilst I will never be able to make it up to them, I shall spend a life time trying.
peacefullyerratic.com 