90% of flash backs so far have been in home, or in privacy, a place where I can hide, A place of safety, whether in my home or in my car, or in a place were no one sees meTonight my mind played games, tonight, in front of others, I broke,I write this embarrassed and… Continue reading Fuck Flashbacks
Tag: flashback
Yesterday evening, Lightning lit the night skies, with a couple of soft sounds of thunder. When Storm Denis decided it wasn't going to leave without a final strong goodbye, as very loud bangs and rumbles filled the night, it sounded like it was right out side our bedroom window, I will admit I screamed in… Continue reading
One Vision
Often flashbacks pay me a visit, often without warning, flashbacks remind me of the path I have walked, I feel uncomfortable, I hate the vision, I hate the emotion, I hate the fear, I loathe the control as it takes over me. I have learnt to disguise them from daily life, act as if nothing… Continue reading One Vision
I am not afraid to say I am afraid
Further more to the post I attempted a few days ago!! I used to be able to let words flow, Sit and let my fingers let go, releasing pain, releasing emotion, Tears would fall, blurred visions, typing not perfect, yet it was my safe space, hidden for so long, I braved my soul and opened… Continue reading I am not afraid to say I am afraid
What is reality
I seek attention, yet I self loathe, I seek to brag, yet I shy away from people in person, I seek to glamouize suicide, yet my story is that of only a fight for survival, I hide my arms, my raw cuts, my scars, pulling my sleeves lower when people's heads turn, Yet I demand… Continue reading What is reality
One week ago I became best friends with my demons, One week ago today, this time, this moment., I took the path of deciding to want to end my life, physically and mentally crossing a barrier, One week ago I was on the most serious path of self destruction I have ever walked. I stated… Continue reading
Flashback
Hugs, cuddles, squishes, what ever you chose to call this sign of affection, its meant to be one of warmth and love, esp from a parent right? Welcome to my world were from a mother this moment was one of pain and discomfort. It started with her hugging me so tight, bear hug I think… Continue reading Flashback
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