Flashbacks for me are done in a situation that mean nothing, but my mind playing games with me, today was different, today I ended up feeling physically sick but yet again had to hide my feelings, as the situation was so hard. This morning a planned meeting, one of a serious nature, but one that… Continue reading Flashback
Tag: family
Pain
I guess I should give this post a trigger warning, I have no idea. I am at a loss what is real, what is a concern or what is normal any more. Friday night, anxiety kicked in hard and fast, reason and logic left my mind, No control, no emotion just pure self loathing taking… Continue reading Pain
*drunken ramblings #3*
I no longer know whats real, time escapes me, moments leave me, I write this after a panic attack kicked in hard and fast with the trigger hiding deep in a day of chaos. This is ending up all over the place, but I really don't care right now.... I may have issues, it doesn't… Continue reading *drunken ramblings #3*
Protected: Dear Oldest Girl Child
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Deja Vu
The letter box rattling today, a highly confidental letter, doubled up to ensure privacy, my heart skipping a beat, pulling the papers towards me, glancing down reading the print before me. My heart now in my mouth as the tears threatened to show, the words floating before me, fear over taking me, a feeling of… Continue reading Deja Vu
*drunken ramblings #2*
Do you ever sit there and wonder about you? Who you are, I mean deep down inside, the workings the making of, the whole, I am me, but who I am kind of stuff? 2017, I was a women getting by in life, someone who was just dealing with daily life, unhappy but happy, happy… Continue reading *drunken ramblings #2*
A Precious Life Changing Memory : Chapter 4
This is going to be the hardest for me to write, thankfully its short, but even so..... June 2003 Social Services got in touch wanted to see me and H. Wanted the to meet with out my mother around. This wasn't easy but I managed to do it. The meeting with this social worker boiled… Continue reading A Precious Life Changing Memory : Chapter 4
Detached reality
ok before I start 1) I'm on the rum and 2) I dont want to turn this into a lifestyle blog or a blog about my life in general. Yet this post sort of covers that. Detached reality , this is what I have become and I struggle to understand this feeling. Standing alone yet… Continue reading Detached reality
A Precious Life Changing Memory : Chapter 3
This post comes with one beautiful positive and two terrifying negatives, both held strong in my memory. Ill start with the positive but that's mainly due to it being the first moment to happen between the two. The latter sadly leads to a even bigger chapter that happened to cause my life to almost shatter… Continue reading A Precious Life Changing Memory : Chapter 3
Flashback
Hugs, cuddles, squishes, what ever you chose to call this sign of affection, its meant to be one of warmth and love, esp from a parent right? Welcome to my world were from a mother this moment was one of pain and discomfort. It started with her hugging me so tight, bear hug I think… Continue reading Flashback
Flashback
I have been unsure of what to title these short blog posts, a snippet of my history. Short flashbacks of moments that really impacted my life. Moments that may seem insignificant to some but to me, they have caused a ripple effect throughout my life. If anyone can think of a better title...let me know!None… Continue reading Flashback
*I’m Fine, But I’m not OK* 11/5/19
This was a day of very high emotion, a day where my husband saw me at the lowest, a day that I wish I could change, but I can't do that, so reflecting and moving on, is all I can at least try to do May 10th 2019. That knot hit me hard again. Despite… Continue reading *I’m Fine, But I’m not OK* 11/5/19
A Precious Life Changing Memory : Chapter 2
Friday January 14th 2000 Chapter 1 can be viewed hereThe little bundle hadn't arrived when expected, so it was time for the eviction notice to take place. The date was set, my bags packed and my transport to the hospital sorted. I had a last min scan to ensure all was OK, sent to a… Continue reading A Precious Life Changing Memory : Chapter 2
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